SCAVenging for Vegeta
by Jerint of Balors Peak
Summary: A funny story I've written for SCAV, my freaky friend who's dominated Vegeta.------This story is rated PG-13 for an over-use of STRONG language
1. Disclaimer and Dedication

Disclaimer and Dedication:  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own any people, names, restaurants or anything like that that exists in reality. I'm a writer, a kinda stupid DBZ fan, and an artist, not a businessperson. Duh.  
  
Dedication: This FanFiction is dedicated to-**clears throat**SCAV, who gave me the inspiration and moral support to write and draw DBZ. She made me the artist and writer I am today. So, SCAV, this one's for you.. 


	2. The Ouji Cometh!

Chapter 2 that should be Chapter 1:  
  
I slammed my backpack onto the couch and groaned. Kami had apparently been in a bad mood today, and had also apparently decided that I, SCAV, would be his victim. The reasons: 1. I'd woken up late because my calico kitten, Saiyajin Princess, had decided my $82.67 Sony alarm clock would be a nice scratching post and place to bite. 2. I'd gotten my savings from the past two weeks stolen, so now I couldn't get the Kid Buu Saga of DBZ on tape. 3. I'd messed up on a drawing of Vegeta-in Sharpie. 4. I didn't have any ideas for Vegeta vs. Vejita  
  
The only message I'd like to send to Kami: "Damn you, you fucking pickle-skinned son-of-a-bitch!"  
  
As you can tell, I don't restrict myself too much with language. I'd even give you a little list of my day-to-day curse and swear word list-but you don't really give a damn, do you.anyways:  
  
I flopped on to the beige, soft, squishy, perfect couch in front of our huge TV, threatened to flush Derek's head in the toilet after he's used it if he didn't get me a Stewarts root beer and popcorn and fast, picked up the remote, flipped to 56, grabbed my junk food from Derek, gave Derek a two-week old gummy worm from my linty pocket and settled back to watch 'Evil Kid Buu!' (A/N: I don't like to go through play-by-plays of episodes; I leave that to the DBZ fans) (Half an hour later..)  
  
I sighed happily. Yet another 24 minutes of DBZ with my Saiyajin no Ouji, occasionally interrupted by the evil ads for Kool-Aid and Kraft Easy Mac.  
  
The only thing that would make today perfect would be actually having Veggie-no, Vegeta in my room. Unfortunately, a boring, 17 page review of three-digit multiplication was all that waited in my room. Damn.  
  
I dragged my sorry, Vegeta-loving carcass up to my room and collapsed at my desk.  
  
Before I started on Problem One (167x482), I would clear my head a bit with two simple things.  
  
I stuck a piece of sandalwood incense into my clay incense burner, breathed deeply, then took a mechanical pencil out of the pack I got from the CVS and started drawing Vegeta. Somehow, drawing the Saiyajin who'd always been shoved down, who'd always been labeled as evil, who deserved much, much more attention than the bastard named Kakarotto, and was the Prince of all Saiyajins calmed me.  
  
I drew two sloping triangles for eyebrows, added the ovals underneath, the pupil, the Z-shaped lines under the eyes, a small nose, a smirk, the head outline, ears, ear insides, hair, neck----Derek threw a (presumably) plastic set of Dragonballs on my desk.  
  
"That little jerk! Once I get my hands on him he'll be eating moths for a week! He messed up my drawing of Vegeta! I'll kill him!"  
  
I was steaming mad. A large drop of sweat rolled down my cheek and fell on the desk, making a small burn mark.  
  
Derek of the Assholes would pay! But first, some boring 3rd- grade math reviews.  
  
Hey! The Dragonballs! I could make myself laugh by saying that chant to summon Shenlong! Might as well try...  
  
I spread the Dragonballs out on the lawn a line, starting with the one-star 'Ball, ending with the seven-star 'Ball.  
  
I raised my hands over the Dragonballs and started the chant. (A/N: Forgive me! I forgot the chant! Well, most of it.**runs away from single angry reviewer**) ".By your name I summon you.SHENLONG!!!!" This was weird.the sky darkened, a sudden wind was raised, and--- -Shenlong came out of the Dragonballs?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! "You have summoned me. You have three wishes." "Uh.cool." Wait a sec, this is Shenlong! The Eternal Dragon! And- IN MY FRIGGIN' BACKYARD!!!  
  
"Uh, okay, Mr. Eternal Dragon, erm, my.first wish is.for $12,345,677,899,999,999,999,999,00,02,342,324.17."  
  
Shenlong nodded. "It is done."  
  
I fidgeted with my glasses. "My second wish is for 3 more wishes!"  
  
Shenlong shook his huge, green-scaled head. "Sorry, SCAV, no can do."  
  
"Damn! Then I wish for...a..house full of Vegeta stuff."  
  
Shenlong nodded. "It is done. You have one more wish."  
  
I didn't have to think about this one! "I WISH FOR VEGETA TO BE IN MY ROOM WHEN I GO INSIDE!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
Shenlong winced, then nodded. "You don't have to be so frickin' loud, ya know. Anyways, you have used you third and final wish. Now I can sleep again!"  
  
Shenlong vanished into the Dragonballs. The 'Balls rose up into the black sky, then shot off in different directions.  
  
The sky cleared, the wind stopped, the sun shone, and I fainted. ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ REVIEW PLEASE!!!!! And please tell everyone you know who likes DB/Z/ and who reads fanfictions about this if you like it! Oujis Saiyancat'92 


	3. The Rise of Evil

Story Title: SCAVenging for Vegeta  
  
Chapter Title: The Rise of Evil Censor: PG-13 (language and that) Main Characters: Vegeta and SCAV Disclaimer: I do not own any shops, restaurants, etc. in this story. SCAV is a real person, but I have made up her family (in this fic). I do not own Vegeta. I am fighting to the death with SCAV over who marries Vegeta, though.**adjusts machine gun, rifles, swords, water guns, stink bombs, canteen, tent, TV, laptop, LOTR trilogy set and Vegeta pictures** Yep, I'm ready for war! Anyways: ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
The Rise of Evil  
  
Birds flew around the black sky, tweeting and chasing little black stars.  
  
From far away I heard Derek saying, "I know, it's really sad.."  
  
Another voice, deep enough to be male said something I didn't catch, and Derek responded, "Did I see how it happened? Yeah! SCAV (that's what we call her) was leaning on that tree, reading Beckett DBZ, and this guy, he's dressed in black, right? And he's wearing these sunglasses, right? So I can't see his face, right? And this guy, he sneaks up on SCAV, right? And he grabs SCAV's magazine, right? And he's wearing these gloves, right? So there aren't any fingerprints, right? And anyways, this guy, he says, 'Hey, girl, you look good enough to make a bull feel horny', right? And SCAV, she says 'Back off', right? And then the guy, he grabs SCAV, right? And SCAV starts punchin' him, but she's too weak, right? And then the guy, he grabs SCAV, right? And he starts taking her to this car, right? So then I come out and I hit the hell out of him, right? And the guy, he drops SCAV and kicks her on the head right? And then he runs to his car and drives away right? And then I called you guys, right? And I guess you know the rest, right? An-" The cop cut him off. "Thank ye son, we got enough."  
  
By now I'd recovered from the initial shock of seeing a huge, green, floating dragon in my backyard. I opened my eyes and said weakly, "Derek, you piece of shit, you're payin' for that."  
  
Derek bit his lip, laughed nervously, then commenced operation RLH (a.k.a Run Like Hell)  
  
I smirked like a (true, non-Kakarotty) Saiyajin. SCAV was once again the Evil One. ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
A/N: Review, please! I spent forever on this chap; Kami's plaguing me with the dreaded Writers Block. Anyway, if you're not SCAV (thanks for being my first reviewer!!!^~^(Cat thinger)) Meow Mix! Ouji's Saiyancat'92 


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